Reflection Reveals Recreating is Warranted

In the last few months my life has changed dramatically. I lost my paying job as many others have during this crazy time.

I spent hours each day doing absolutely nothing productive for about a month. Then I spent days at a time working on the landscape of my home. I learned I really like working outside and I could be proud as I saw many improvements I had been too busy or lazy to conquer before. It became a sense of pride. It was rewarding.

Then I had a moment of clarity when I remembered something Dr. Phil had said in an interview with an unemployed guest. He said something along the lines of, “Your job is to find a job. You need to spend 8 hours a day working on finding a job.”

I took this to heart.

No, I am not spending 8 hours a day looking for a job because the reality is there are no jobs to be found at this point.

What I am doing is spending as much time as I can diversifying my resume. Or at least, trying to diversify my resume.

I am fortunate enough to have a library system which provides free access to online courses. There are two types, Lynda Video Training and Gale Courses.

Lynda training is self-paced and allows me to explore anything without a structured time frame.

I started with computer programming because I really enjoyed my time learning about it when I was a long-term substitute in Middle School Computer class. I thought, “This is perfect. I will learn a skill and be able to have a career from the comforts of my own home.”

I was proud of myself as I downloaded the program and was able to follow along with the professor for approximately 45 minutes. Then something happened.

It was the same thing that happened when I took Trigonometry my freshman year of college. Three weeks into the course I stared at the professor and realized he was speaking a foreign language and I did not have a translator. I was so far behind and had no hope of catching up or passing. I dropped the class.

Reflection made me question – If I don’t find learning it enjoyable, how would I possibly enjoy doing it for a living?

Within an hour of staring at my computer I changed my “Path” to Graphic Design and I am so glad I did. I am learning so much and I have found myself sketching constantly.

Even better, I am dreaming big dreams.

Next week I will start three Gale courses which are time structured with actual assignments and feedback from the Professors. They are

Certified Mindfullness

Spanish in the Classroom

Writing for Children

I am looking forward to them and I definitely feel they fit my new focus on diversifying my resume.

Now, to the title of this post, “Reflection Reveals Recreating is Warranted.”

Three months. I have been home (literally) for three months with very little contact with others. My contacts include

The people and dog who live in my house – dog is the one I talk to the most.

People who text and my best friend who knows I hate talking on the phone but calls me for hours at a time. She’s lucky I love her.

The neighbors I like who happen to like yard work as much as I do.

Social media – does that really count?

With three months of being fairly alone with my thoughts, I have had a lot of time to reflect. Taking the courses and doing other research online covering all my various interests and desire to find a source of income, has given me plenty to reflect upon.

My conclusion is – I have not posted anything on this blog for a very long time. I haven’t even looked at it because in some strange way it had become a chore.

Maybe obligation with no real direction is a better way of referring to it.

Now, I realize the blog was all about me trying to make a name for myself without really being true to myself. It was all hide in the shadows of what I want to say but am afraid to say. It didn’t have substance.

So, I am recreating the Creation of myself. I am creating something more authentic.

Don’t you think the World needs more of that at this time?

I am going to post things that I am doing, trying, hoping to do. They will most likely all revolve around fairies, gardening, writing and most importantly dreaming of a brighter world and future.

So, I hope you are able to join me on my adventures to be a better, more authentic person and that you will enjoy the ride.

If not, I wish you peace on your own journey.


I love gardening and magical beings. My profile is a garden ready to be created,

Posted in Uncategorized
3 comments on “Reflection Reveals Recreating is Warranted
  1. I’m so glad you’re back!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. joey says:

    Good for you! Sometimes we need a bit of impetus to make us focus, refocus, and balance.

    Liked by 1 person

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