It’s Mother’s Day in the United States. If you are one of the lucky ones who will be celebrating it with your mother, mother-in-law, or your children, this post is not for you. You may feel free to take a day off from May’s Challenge to bring peace into the world. You are lucky enough to have peace at this moment.
Seriously, stop reading and go ahead a celebrate with your loved ones. I’ll be here again tomorrow.
Still reading? Then, I admit I may be missing something, I can only think of four reasons you are not off to celebrate.
1. You never knew your mother or you are estranged from her.
2. Your mother has given up residence in the body that held her so she could hold you.
3. You are a mother who has lost her child.
4. You want to be a mother and for some reason you are unable.
Even while writing these examples, I am tempted to shed a tear. So tragic, so sad. But I am here to inspire and I promise to address each circumstance in a way I hope brings you peace.
1. You never knew your mother or you are estranged from her.
Realize that your mother gave you a tremendous gift, she brought you into this world. She may a have given you up at birth because you would be better off being raised by someone else. She may have died when you were very young and you have no memories of her. She may have been a selfish, terrible mother who beat you every day and now you live away from her with no interest in ever seeing her again. I hope this isn’t the case, but it is a possibility.
On this Mother’s Day, I want you to remember that you are alive because your mother delivered you. What happened after that is not relevant. She brought you into this world, and now you have the gift of life that you, only you, choose how to live. Live in peace and happiness. Do everything you can to follow your own dreams. Go out and find other people who will be mother figures for you.
Simply say thank you for my life, and leave it at that. Move on, this is your life.
2. Your mother has given up residence in the body that held her so she could hold you.
I think this is the most common reason for people to be sad on Mother’s Day. I have a lot of friends in this category.
Remember your mother loves you. She did everything she could while alive to make your life more enjoyable and easier. She taught you well. She cried with you when you cried. She celebrated your accomplishments. You cherished her. Though she is not here in the physical, she is still here with you. Really, she is with you even more now because every time you think of her, she is by your side. She is still loving you, celebrating your success, holding you while you cry and sending you warnings when you are in danger.
Honor your mother by remembering her today. You could even buy flowers or chocolates or whatever you would have done were she still in the physical. Eat the chocolate and tell her how great it tastes, smell the flowers and appreciate their beauty. You could even buy a card, fill it out and bury it in the garden or burn it. Children deliver letters to Santa Claus in similar fashion, why wouldn’t it work for your mother?
3. You are a mother who has lost her child.
I am so sorry. This is tragic, it is not at all how we humans think the world should work. No parent should outlive their child. The only comfort I can offer is my belief that we all take on this incarnation for a reason. Our soul wants to learn a lesson and when that lesson is learned our soul has a choice. It can continue in the physical, or it can go to another dimension in order to be in “Heaven” or to take another incarnation and learn a new lesson.
No matter what your child’s soul has chosen to do now, just as is true for mothers in spirit, your child is with you every time you think of him/her. Your child still loves you and appreciates everything you have done. Do something you would have done with your child and realize s/he is with you in this moment. Watch children playing on a playground and imagine your child playing along with them. After all, why wouldn’t that be possible with spirit?
4. You want to be a mother and for some reason you are unable.
Sometimes life is just simply and completely unfair. If you really are unable to have children and can provide for them, consider adopting. Consider fostering a child. If that is out of the question, volunteer with children. Spend time with friends who have children. Surround yourself with children.
I hear you telling me, but that would be like putting salt in a wound. Yes, exactly. Putting salt in a wound is painful, but every time I had cuts on my legs and went into the ocean, it hurt at first and then it always seemed the wounds healed faster. If you have your teeth pulled out, you gargle with salt water. Salt is painful, but it is also healing.
Surround yourself with the children you want. Love them as if they were your own (Don’t overstep your bounds though, don’t override the parents). In time, you may find that you are surrounded by adults who think of you as a mother figure. This may be exactly what your soul wanted you to learn in this incarnation. Make the best of what you have.
Finally, for each of these categories, if you are crying because of the loss you are feeling this Mother’s Day, cry. Let out big whole body sobs. Don’t be ashamed of your emotions. Then, when your eyes have run out of tears, hold your head high and go on with your day.
Take a walk, plant a garden, visit friends, visit a nursing home, see a movie, just do something to take your mind off your sadness, and realize you are not alone.
I am sending you a great big, loving embrace be it from a mother or a child, may you feel the love surrounding you.
I love gardening and magical beings. My profile is a garden ready to be created,
Maneé Trautz 
I kinda wish I’d read this in the morning, but I was out and about enjoying my day. (As suggested) I’ve been the mother who lost a child (baby) and a mother who for years, could not conceive. I think the latter is far more painful, as must be no longer having a mother. Great post. Lovely read.
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I am glad you enjoyed your day and I appreciate your perspective. I would tend to agree with you, and am glad you finally were able to have your children.
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